Surviving the Narcissistic Parent: ACoNs (Adult Children of Narcissists)

Emotional abuse: surviving an emotionally abusive childhood, and healing from it.

The Invisible Scar

narcissistic-mothers-sm

April is Child Abuse Awareness and Prevention month. At The Invisible Scar, we are focusing on emotional child abuse, such as the various types, how to help emotionally abused children,  resources for healing, adult survivors of emotional child abuse, and the special case of narcissism.

Adult children of narcissistic parents (ACoNs) know a special type of emotional abuse in being raised by narcissists. (Biological mothers, stepmothers, biological fathers, and stepfathers can be N parents.) 

Before we discuss the special case of narcissism, please note that not every emotionally abusive parent has the narcissistic personality disorder. In some circumstances, an emotionally abusive parent who is not a narcissist can change and improve his or her parenting.  The same is not true for the narcissistic parent, however. Every narcissistic parent is an emotional abuser.

A narcissist is a person who has the narcissistic personality disorder.

Narcissistic personality disorder is one…

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Emotional Abuse and how to escape

Emotional abuse at the hands of a partner is rarely talked about.

Here is a useful blog post about separating from an emotionally abusive partner, and about how time apart allows you to see things more clearly, reflect on issues which day to day life was masking.

Beat the Narcissist this Year.

Share this blog to raise awareness of a situation many people find it hard to escape from.

Some emotionally abusive people are also violent, but don’t kid yourself here – emotion abuse without violence is deeply damaging.

It’s Child Abuse Awareness Month

April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month (in the United States) – so today is the perfect day for a first blog entry.

Child Abuse is an umbrella term which also covers Child Neglect (emotional and physical), verbal abuse (such as swearing), abandonment and threats of harm to the child. Child Abuse can involve particular actions, or inaction (such as failure to provide for the child).

Preventing child abuse is not a job for parents or carers alone – the whole community has a role in preventing child abuse.

The six protective factors for preventing child abuse are:

  • Nuturing and Attachment
  • Knowledge of Parenting and Child Development
  • Parental Resilience
  • Social Connections
  • Concrete Supports for Parents
  • Social and Emotional Competence of Children

If a child is being neglected or abused it does not necessarily mean the parents are ‘bad’ or are intentionally causing the child harm. It can mean a parent/carer/relative and someone else in contract with the child is causing the issue, or it can be a sign of a person who is in need of more support or who is unaware there is an issue. Reporting possible abuse or neglect is the best way to help improve a child’s life.
For the children you know, how can help them? If you have children yourself, are they aware of OK, and not OK? Do they know who they could tell if they are worried about their friends? Is there a child you know who often seems sad, afraid or angry, have you asked them why this is? Would you know the signs of possible abuse if you saw them – for example patterns of marks on a child’s ear, or an unusual way of acting towards others? You do not need to be 100% sure to report a possible case of neglect or abuse, professionals can look into it themselves.
If there a child you know who may be neglected or abused, contact a helpline today to report it.

Further information
https://www.childwelfare.gov/preventing/preventionmonth/
http://www.preventchildabuse.com/
http://www.ispcan.org

Raising awareness within our own communities is one of the key ways to prevent child abuse, and to stop it early.